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Writer's pictureErin Saulino

I am just a mom.

While I would love for this blog to be all about fun, light topics, sharing my love of coffee and dogs, that is not the reality we live in. I feel compelled to speak up about this, my heart is absolutely sickened.


A child in Oklahoma, Nex Benedict, died this month after being bullied and assaulted in school. Nex was a non-binary 16 year old student. The school failed to call an ambulance or the police after he received a head injury. The next day, he was taken to the hospital after collapsing at home. He stopped breathing and was pronounced dead at the hospital.


Every child has a right to go to school and be safe. Every child deserves to be treated as if they matter. Nex's school failed them across the board. They were bullied for the past year. What was done? They were confronted in the girls bathroom by three older students. After being assaulted with a head injury, the school nurse did not call an ambulance or alert their mother to the possible repercussions of a head injury. Why? Why did they not matter?


A lawmaker in Oklahoma later referred to LGBTQ+ in Oklahoma as "filth". When confronted with Nex's death, the lawmaker said he was sorry he died, but it does not change the way he feels or his values. He feels it's his duty to uphold the morals of the state for his Christian state of Oklahoma.


So, where in the bible does it say it is ok to beat someone to death who does not agree with everything you say. Where in the bible does it say torturing children is ok?


First, we have this thing called the Establishment Clause in the Constitution. This means that there is no national religion and prefer or promote one religion over another. As with the Alabama Supreme Court quoting God 41 times in its opinion, Oklahoma is not a Christian state. No state in this country is.


Second, why? Why do we feel it is ok to promote and demand hate? Hate of children, hate of women, hate of anyone who does not look like you or pray at your church. Why? This country was founded in part on religious freedom. That means your religion should not dictate how this country is run, and how our citizens are treated.


For the supposed pro-lifers there is so much hate of anyone who does not conform to your idea of "moral" behavior. You know what is so great about this country, you can do you. As I have written about before, you do not have to marry someone of the same sex. You do not have change your pronouns. You do not have to get an abortion. You do not have to get involved in a people's lives, who have absolutely nothing to do with you, in their personal and most private of decisions.


I grew up in a mixed religion household. My mother is jewish, my father catholic. While I do not agree with the Church's pro-life stance, I do agree with their charity and support of all people. They are actually pro-life, in that they help people at any stage of life. Food drives, soup kitchens, Catholic Charity Services - all things that help people regardless of religion.


One day at mass, Monsignor spoke about an article he read regarding the events of 9-11. He talked about how people were rushing to help those that needed aid that morning. The writer, who I believe was a priest or a devout catholic, made the assumptions when he saw who was there helping, he was shocked. He assumed looking at them, some were pierced, tattooed, hair dyed, looking raggedy, black, brown, white, that they would not help. But they did, they stood up and helped their fellow humans. I took this homily as we should not judge a book by its cover. We should not stereotype people based on their looks or your own biases. Helping others in need is not just a catholic or christian thing - it is a human thing.


Our country has lost its humanity. We are ok with a lawmaker denouncing the death of a child while also saying he is part of the filth in his state. We are ok with politicians and lawyers limiting the rights of those in the name of their religion not science. We are ok with the hypocrisy of being "pro-life", yet hating children, people who want to just live in peace and those that want to feel their lives are as valued as a bunch of frozen cells.


Children and teens today are different than my generation. They are flexible, fluid and open minded. How is it my responsibility or anyone else's to step on them, to tell them they are less than a human because I am inflexible and bigoted. It is not. Hate is taught, not innate. Fear of losing our way of life spurns hate. No one cares about you living your life. My ability to accept a child that is gay, non-binary or whatever, has absolutely nothing to do with you. Calling children and those different than you "filth" is a reflection on you, your hatred and your complete lack of humanity. It is a reflection that you have absolutely no idea what it means to be a Christian.


Hate has no home here is a great sentiment, but most of this country seems to disagree. Hate is the way of life, it is a way to control others to fit into your ideals, it is a way to keep people down so they don't take away from what is supposedly yours. Children are dying. Yet, society does not care.


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